Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

I can't help sometimes but to feel envious when I read that someone 'just knew' that this dress was 'the one' or that they 'fell in love' with their hall from the moment they walked in. I haven't had any of those feelings yet. For anything! I am so busy second guessing myself and trying not to spend too much money that all this other junk is always clouding my opinion. I visited over 30 reception halls and called at least 50 (no joke b/w long island and Jersey) searching for the one that would just fill my eyes with tears when I saw it. You know the one I mean, the one that would give me that feeling inside (without sending me to the poorhouse). But I never found it (I actually did cry at a 2 places but that was out of frustration). Is there something wrong with me that I just don't 'love' anything? I really WANT to! I am sorry I sound pathetic, I am just venting b/c my FH won't hear it anymore.

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

ive liked the reception halls I've been too.. I fell in love with Sandcastle skylight room but it was too much money(around $100 +tax/grat)... did you check them out?

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

Laura I know what you mean hun!!! I feel that I'm making decisions with my head not my heart because I want to stay on some sort of budget!!!! I talked to FItobe about this and he agrees we shoudn't go into the poor house but instead buy a house. My catering hall is nice but I'm not IN LOVE with it - but I'm ok with that because it works! We agreed to spend the extra cash on all the 'little things' and make it a very personal wedding which is what we want. So just know you aren't alone!!!

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

butterfly that's my room!!!!!!!!!!! I'm getting married there next Sept!

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

i personally liked that room.. but im going to be booking a place $30 less per person.. and thats a big difference to me.. were also going to buy a house right away

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

I'm not too fond of the rest of the place - like it being on the main st. - but since we are having a smaller wedding it had such a cozy feeling!!!! Me and FItobe aren't 100% about it but the more I think about it - the more I get excited but not still there yet. I'm happy to hear someone else liked it!!!


Edited - where are you booking?

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

It is hard to be frugal when you have a Spring/summer wedding...there are so few places to get deals because everyone gets bookings. Carlyle on the green is a fabulous place and their service is impeccable! As long as you look into your FH eyes and fall completely inlove with him that's all you need . Don't stress too much, it takes all the fun out of this stuff.

Edited:
We actually changed our original wedding date from the end of May 2004 to Jan 9th 2004 because I wanted to get certain halls & photographer & such, and it is easier to get a good deal that time of year, PLUS we are having our wedding on a Friday!

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

Olga, I wish I could make myself feel better by saying that 'okay, i don't ABSOLUTELY LOVE it but at least we are getting a good price for it' - but i can't! Because we're not! I picked the most expensive place on our list! B/c it had the least negatives (see how i think? Not 'it had the most positives' but, the least negatives). Ughh I feel terrible for even writing this b/c if my FH knew he would DIE! We already booked it and can't get our money back so it is a done deal and i just have to s*ck it up. I know that. But I can't stop thinking 'when the hell am I going to get excited about something and not feel buyer's remorse?' I am not even happy about the date that I chose b/c I let everyone else guide my opinion!!!! I dunno - like I said, I think i am just having a tough time with spending so much money on a day that i wanted to be simple and small. My hall is beautiful, I know everything will be fine - it's just not the picture i had in my head of what i wanted from the beginning ( I couldn't afford those places (Flowerfield), or they were changing caterers and I couldn't book for next year (Port Jeff), or they re-constructing the entire building and i was nervous they wouldn't be done in time (Bellport Country Club). I am not a gambler or a risk-taker and i think that is my problem. I think I am too much of a nervous nelly to enjoy any of these decisions....

okay - so who do i write the check out to for today's session? I feel like I just went to a shrink!

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

laurapete: don't worry, we've all been there. FH an I were nothing but happy when we booked our vendors; then like 2 or 3 weeks later i freaked out 'am i booking the right vendors?' i second guessed everything but deeop down i know it's what's best for us! let me know if you need anything!

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

We went throught the same thing. It took us 8 months to find a place. We went all over LI, NYC, and Westchester. I've seen it all I think. What type of place and price are you looking for? Maybe I can help (free of course:). We visited over 50 locations, and called even more, no joke.

We found the location we wanted when it was our absolute final place to visit (we had decided to take the $ from the FH mom and dad and just take an extremely long honeymoon and have the wedding in city hall). We only kept that appointment because we couldn't get ahold of anyone to cancel! But, when we drove up we both sighed and knew it was our place.

If there's a place you're interested in, make sure to bargain (don't let them see your face light up first, in fact do this over the phone before visiting). Also, something I didn't do-check references. Even the most beautiful place can turn into a nightmare if they are not giving good service.

We got our site for $40 less pp than their lowest prices in the books. It all depends of course. We were booking only 7 months in advance and were willing to take whatever lunch they had left open. But, we got a great deal. But, with a recession on, some places are willing to deal.


Let me know if I can help. If you have a beach wedding, mansion wedding, unusual wedding, Bed and Breakfast wedding, museum wedding, loft wedding etc. etc. etc.....I might be able to tell you about some places within your budget.

Best wishes! Please FM me if you want some help. Also, I might be able to direct you to some free location finding services to, as well as NYC caterers......I'm less than 90 days to my wedding, so I've done a lot of this already.

As for the dress, I was deciding between 2 dresses-neither of which made me cry. So, again, I took a shot and made one final appointment with Kleinfelds (they were holding some dresses from a designer I'd met), and tried on 'the dress'.

Moral of the story: Just keep looking!! Same thing with dresses, I went to a ton of stores/designers. The price range I was looking in was $1000 to $3500. If you're interested in more info about where to get samples, consignment designer gowns, and if you have a style in mind in that price range but aren't sure where to go-I might be able to help.

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

laura,
i wish u the best. yes you have deposited, but if u are not happy then you have to reconsider. this is one of the biggest days of your life and u must be happy w/ ur decisions. how much did u deposit at carlye?

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

$5000 - that is their standard deposit fee. Non-refundable.

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

its between manor east, verdis, and stewart manor CC

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

Moria - i sent you fm

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

alright girls, i am going to bed. my fh thinks i am having an affair on-line (jk of course...)

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

we looked at caryle but could not afford it. would they refund any of it. u have to be happy. i myself loved it there but if it's not u then you have to look into something else.

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

hey girl .. i can totally relate. i feel that way about a lot of the things i booked - like i just did it cuz it made sense and it was in the right price range. but i figure that's fine .. im happy with it and it's done. it's the little things that you should spend your time on and do with your heart. for me it's the little unique touches to my reception and things like that. things i can completely control

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

When we looked at halls I wasnt really overwhelmed. I was excited. after we looked at 3 we just kept talking about the first hall we looked at. we watched the video tape (we videotaped the halls we looked at) and when watching the videotape i pictured our wedding and got mistyeyed. thats when i knew that hall was perfect for us.

my dress the first time i put it on i was like its a dress. everyone around me was crying and i was like can i take this Damn thing off.

the next day its all i could think about. for a week i couldnt get that dress out of my head. I went back a week later with my mom and when i put it on, and the woman added the veil i was like wow holy moly this dress looks fabulous on me. I love it. i feel like a queen.

video they were the first and last. I had tears in my eyes when i was watching the video's. i knew they were perfect for us.

photo we looked at 3. the 3rd company is the one we booked. the first one we were like eh, its ok. nothing fabulous. just wasnt feeling it. the second one he liked but i wasnt comfortable with them. the 3rd one we had a great time talking to them. they were nice, friendly, funny and were beyond willing to work with us.

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

Laura - I know you are still upset!!!! We're here for you!!!! If you are so concerned about the date - there is plenty of time for them to rebook the date - if you want to change it it shouldnt be horrible - try talking to them!!!! And if not remember May is a beautiful month!!! That's because it's my birthday And remember - while it might not be the end all teary eyed 'i knew it when I saw it' place just remember there is PLENTY of opportunity to make it your own!!!

Re: Anyone else not 'fall in love' with ANYTHING (hall, dress, china etc.)??

its definatly the friends and the family that make it a terrific day. special touches you bring to the day, traditions, dances and having everyone with you.

All i keep thinking is I cant wait to just celebrate with everyone. We have friends that are counting the days with us, family members that are on WW now so they can look good for the wedding, and us looking at what we can add to the day to make it our day.

If you are happy everyone around you will be happy.