Brides Helping Brides ™ - ADVICE PLEASE....NOW AN UPDATE..READ MY NEW REPLY!!!!

Post new topic

Wedding Forums > Brides Helping Brides ™ > ADVICE PLEASE....NOW AN UPDATE..READ MY NEW REPLY!!!!

ADVICE PLEASE....NOW AN UPDATE..READ MY NEW REPLY!!!!

sweetdoublenn Posted: Nov 18, 2008 09:51 PM+

sweetdoublenn MEMBER SINCE: 10/07 TOTAL POSTS : 3605 WEDDING DATE: Sep 12, 2008 WEDDING LOCATION: Newburgh, NY

Posted: Nov 18, 2008 09:51 PM

ADVICE PLEASE....NOW AN UPDATE..READ MY NEW REPLY!!!!

Remember all the drama I had with my ex-bestfriend and I dismissed her of my wedding and we just stopped talking to one another?

Well I found out her mom died!!! I have no idea how I feel so crappy..Her mom was always good to me! I've known her since I was 12! I'm in shock cause I can't believe it!

My question is do I write her an e-mail..send her a text. E-mail her half sister? I don't know why I feel the need to send her my condolences cause she hasn't sought me out yet..But I still feel bad!

What do you think I should do?

wundmoretime Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:04 PM+

wundmoretime MEMBER SINCE: 1/08 TOTAL POSTS : 1890 WEDDING DATE: Sep 20, 2008 WEDDING LOCATION: Bridgeview Yacht Club

Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:04 PM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

Send a sympathy card to the family. Take the high road.

JessesGirl Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:05 PM+

JessesGirl MEMBER SINCE: 12/07 TOTAL POSTS : 703 WEDDING DATE: Nov 21, 2008

Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:05 PM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

Posted by wundmoretime

Send a sympathy card to the family. Take the high road.

I agree. I'd def send a card.

Sweeteey51 Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:07 PM+

Sweeteey51 MEMBER SINCE: 5/08 TOTAL POSTS : 1520 WEDDING DATE: Jun 20, 2009

Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:07 PM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

Yeah Send a card or flowers.

yelley77 Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:10 PM+

yelley77 MEMBER SINCE: 5/07 TOTAL POSTS : 17264 WEDDING DATE: Sep 19, 2008

Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:10 PM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

If you were really good friends, I'd call her. She probably needs you.

sweetdoublenn Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:11 PM+

sweetdoublenn MEMBER SINCE: 10/07 TOTAL POSTS : 3605 WEDDING DATE: Sep 12, 2008 WEDDING LOCATION: Newburgh, NY

Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:11 PM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

I'm gonna get a card tomorrow and mail it tomorrow.

mathteach Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:25 PM+

mathteach MEMBER SINCE: 8/07 TOTAL POSTS : 2714 WEDDING DATE: Jul 27, 2008

Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:25 PM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

Posted by yelley77

If you were really good friends, I'd call her. She probably needs you.

ITA.

bluekat16 Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:42 PM+

bluekat16 MEMBER SINCE: 1/08 TOTAL POSTS : 11080 WEDDING DATE: Dec 27, 2008

Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:42 PM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

I'd send the card but I'd also call her.

tmarie Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:59 PM+

tmarie MEMBER SINCE: 2/07 TOTAL POSTS : 318 WEDDING DATE: May 31, 2008

Posted: Nov 18, 2008 10:59 PM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

In times of death you put things aside. Send a card, a mass card or go to the wake or funeral mass. The mass would give you less contact with your ex-friend.
But dont let it go by with nothing.
I think a text or email is a little tacky. I love technology but not for this.
Good luck, my condolences

JTsGal829 Posted: Nov 18, 2008 11:04 PM+

JTsGal829 MEMBER SINCE: 6/06 TOTAL POSTS : 6529 WEDDING DATE: Nov 07, 2008

Posted: Nov 18, 2008 11:04 PM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

i agree. send a sympathy card! Especially if you were close to her mom.. i'm sure it hurts you too and i'm sure she'd be happy to hear that you are thinking of her and the family!!! In these times people tend to put aside fights and other issues!!!!

sweetdoublenn Posted: Nov 18, 2008 11:13 PM+

sweetdoublenn MEMBER SINCE: 10/07 TOTAL POSTS : 3605 WEDDING DATE: Sep 12, 2008 WEDDING LOCATION: Newburgh, NY

Posted: Nov 18, 2008 11:13 PM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

I know I need to put aside all the differences. When all this bridemaids drama was happening she deleted me off myspace and stopped talking to me altogether...

Maybe her mom was having health problems and never told me...

I am gonna send her a sympathy card. She passed on November 10th. So the wake and funeral has probably already happened.

kimNanthony Posted: Nov 18, 2008 11:43 PM+

kimNanthony MEMBER SINCE: 2/07 TOTAL POSTS : 3597 WEDDING DATE: Jun 01, 2008

Posted: Nov 18, 2008 11:43 PM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

I would definitely call her.

Espo22 Posted: Nov 18, 2008 11:48 PM+

Espo22 MEMBER SINCE: 11/06 TOTAL POSTS : 53757 WEDDING DATE: May 17, 2008

Posted: Nov 18, 2008 11:48 PM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

at times like this you put that all aside. I would call her, thats what she needs right now. If i had a very good friend just send a card i'd be a bit upset. A call would mean alot more and even calling and saying you'll go see her and hearing from you if she needs anything you'll be there for her.

Kristina2009 Posted: Nov 19, 2008 12:00 AM+

Kristina2009 MEMBER SINCE: 10/07 TOTAL POSTS : 3051 WEDDING DATE: May 16, 2009

Posted: Nov 19, 2008 12:00 AM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

Posted by Espo22

at times like this you put that all aside. I would call her, thats what she needs right now. If i had a very good friend just send a card i'd be a bit upset. A call would mean alot more and even calling and saying you'll go see her and hearing from you if she needs anything you'll be there for her.

ITA. A card just doesn't cut it from a once close fried. A wedding is just a wedding. I know it is important and we want our friends there but NOTHING compares to the death of a loved one. Those are times when people realy need their freinds and support means more then than at any other time.

Forget what happend, reach out by phone, and try to be there for her if she wants you to be. Life is short. Whatever spat you had just needs to give.

MrsList09 Posted: Nov 19, 2008 08:13 AM+

MrsList09 MEMBER SINCE: 12/07 TOTAL POSTS : 1727 WEDDING DATE: Apr 18, 2009

Posted: Nov 19, 2008 08:13 AM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

I would send a card and maybe flowers. I think an email or text is too impersonal for someone you've known for so long, even if you're on the outs.

kirstenjk Posted: Nov 19, 2008 08:52 AM+

kirstenjk MEMBER SINCE: 1/08 TOTAL POSTS : 1058 WEDDING DATE: Sep 19, 2008

Posted: Nov 19, 2008 08:52 AM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

Send a sympathy card. If her mom was religious have a service said in her memory.

PeterNina Mom Posted: Nov 19, 2008 09:33 AM+

PeterNina Mom MEMBER SINCE: 8/06 TOTAL POSTS : 2253 WEDDING DATE: Sep 03, 2007

Posted: Nov 19, 2008 09:33 AM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

Posted by JessesGirl

Posted by wundmoretime

Send a sympathy card to the family. Take the high road.

I agree. I'd def send a card.

I agree send the card with a little note saying if she needs you then you are there for her to speak with.
Liz

Kimbalina Posted: Nov 19, 2008 10:18 AM+

Kimbalina MEMBER SINCE: 1/07 TOTAL POSTS : 19578 WEDDING DATE: Nov 08, 2008

Posted: Nov 19, 2008 10:18 AM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

I would call and send the card and flowers

anneandchris Posted: Nov 19, 2008 10:28 AM+

anneandchris MEMBER SINCE: 8/07 TOTAL POSTS : 6284 WEDDING DATE: Nov 01, 2008

Posted: Nov 19, 2008 10:28 AM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

CALL HER! It doesn't matter that she didn't seek you out -- infact nothing else matters right now.

A card, e-mail or text isn't enough IMO.

jtgarsik Posted: Nov 19, 2008 11:26 AM+

jtgarsik MEMBER SINCE: 11/05 TOTAL POSTS : 9837 WEDDING DATE: Dec 01, 2006

Posted: Nov 19, 2008 11:26 AM

Re: ADVICE PLEASE!!!!

honestly, no matter what kind of fight u got into or how much time has gone by - you should call her. You were friends for a very long time....CALL. and THEN send flowers if you'd like.