it finally hit me.... (confession time)..(somewhat update towards bottom of page)

i'm sitting here, counting the seconds until the end of my last work day as a single-woman. i did everything i needed to do to make it easy on my co-workers while i'm gone. so, i have about an hour left.... so far so good.

as i'm sitting here quietly, it hit me. why i am letting things get to me, why i am so dreading my own wedding day, why i want to elope with only 3 days to go................

honestly, from the bottom of my heart, i feel unworthy of being the center of attention. i'm a lot heavier than i should be/than i want to be/than i need to be and that makes me feel like less of a person.

i see all the pics of beautiful sized-0 brides, and i feel that i can never be that. there are some medical reasons why much of this weight is on my body, and my mind knows that. but my heart is broken that i can't be the bride i wish i could be.

i just want to cry.

thanks for reading

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

First and foremost, many to you. Second with all the buzz that's going around you, you might be losing sight of the big picture. Your marrying the man you love. And he loves you just the way you are. I too felt what your feeling, but once you see your groom it all changes. If you think your going to be an unhappy bride, than you will be. But if your willing to let it all go and enjoy the day and enjoy yourself, you'll feel like a million bucks.

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

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Posted by divabride

First and foremost, many to you. Second with all the buzz that's going around you, you might be losing sight of the big picture. Your marrying the man you love. And he loves you just the way you are. I too felt what your feeling, but once you see your groom it all changes. If you think your going to be an unhappy bride, than you will be. But if your willing to let it all go and enjoy the day and enjoy yourself, you'll feel like a million bucks.

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I couldn't agree more

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

Aww...I feel for you. Sometimes I feel the same way...BUT you need to remember that everyone will think you are beautiful, no matter what you weigh when you carry yourself like you love yourself. Also, your FH is marrying you for who you are...he knows you are beautiful. We all know it too...now you just need to realize how wonderful you are.

I have no idea what you look like, but I know that all the girls on here are beautiful in their own way..whether a size 0 or a size 24.

I can't wait to see pictures so we can all prove you wrong on this one.

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

Please don't be sad, you are not the only one in that position. I have 3 children and getting ready for my second wedding, with more weight than I wish to have also. Please be strong and know that you are beautiful no matter how much you weight, size is not the measure of a human being, the heart is. Have a wonderful wedding and be happy.

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

you will make a beautiful bride! Dont be so down on yourself! Trust me...3 months left you think id be crash dieting.....no im sitting here on LIW munching on chips!!
You are getting married to the man you love....just keep positive!

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

When I read your post I felt like I could have written it. I totally understand and feel the same way. But I'm trying to focus on the positive (rather than the disappointment I have in myself) and remember that my FH is madly in love with me and he thinks I'm the most beautiful woman in the world, and friends and family are travelling from all over the country to celebrate our love.

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

You are going to be a beautiful bride.....You and your FH love each other very much....He wouldnt marry you if he didnt love everything about you. Dont be upset jsut enjoy the day enjoy that you will be married to the love of your life...

Good luck and have fun !! You deserve iit

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

I am sure you are going to be a wonderful bride. You are so lucky, you met a man that loves you and wants to spend the rest of his life with you. He loves you for who you are.

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

You are going to be a beautiful bride! We are all so anxious to see your pictures and hear all about the big day! Enjoy your day!!!

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

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Posted by Tracyann1976

He loves you for who you are.

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Could not have put it better myself! Have a great wedding!

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

size 0 bride.... WHERE?!?!?!

Just nerves... You're a lucky woman and definitely like someone else mentioned, look at the big picture! It's going to be a beautiful day and you're going to be beautiful. In the next 3 days, definitely come here for any support you need! YOU'RE GORGEOUS! Remember that!

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

I know personally how hard it is being bigger than you want. I am the big one in my family. As I workout everyday to make sure my dress still fits for my wedding my size 0 sister is baking cookies and eating everything in sight. Its just no fair. However my fh and I am pretty sure yours as well love us for who we are not the number on the scale. So long story short. You are going to be the most beautiful bride that your fh has ever seen and will ever see because he loves you just the way you are. so get ready for all the smiling and remember that it is your day and you do deserve it.

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

I believe all of us have insecurities about our bodies. Your man loves you for you, for who you are and he loves the way you look. Stay strong girl, I think you are just having an emotional breakdown and you need to stay strong . You will be beautiful on your wedding day. You worked hard for this day, do not ruin it. Enjoy girl, we love you here all of us on LIW.

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

you guys are making me cry.... a good cry.

thank you.

you're all right. john loves ME, not the girl sitting next to me, but ME.

i guess i can't look all that bad

again, thanks ladies.

there are 38 minutes left in my day here at work. then it's off to get a manicure and a pedicure. i think i could use some mindless activity.

you guys are the best

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

It makes me sad to read your letter.
You are beautiful and special no matter what you're weight it. Everyone is coming to your wedding for you because they love you and care for you, not what you look like (Which I'm sure you'll look beautiful and stunning).
God gave you a man who loves you for who you are and is marrying you for the same reasons, don't be down on yourself for not looking a certain way, smile, take a deep breath and thank God you have each other.
Good luck on your wedding. And you're beatiful.

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..(somewhat update towards bottom of page)

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..

Chin up 'bride-to-be'

You're going to be just fine! Trust me, people won't be there to critique you! They're there because they want to celebrate your love and union and want to witness this special occasion!

Everything will be fine! You're gonna be showered with so much that you'll feel as beautiful as you truly are! Don't be hard on yourself!

Cheers to you You're getting married!!!

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..(somewhat update towards bottom of page)

Treat yourself to something good, I bought the little Mermaid on DVD to watch, I splurged a little.

Re: it finally hit me.... (confession time)..(somewhat update towards bottom of page)

I'm so happy to read that you are feeling better!

This is your special day and no one can NOT look beautiful when sorrounded by so much love!