I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

I told one of my bm's I didn't want her to be in the wedding party anymore. I had asked her eventhough everyone thought I was crazy and said that she would dissapoint me. She has never been there for me in the past (ie when my brother died) But I thought we had gotten past all that. Well at my bridal shower she showed up 2 minutes before me (it was a suprise) and had to leave early because she had made other plans. She know months in advance about my shower and she didn't seem to care about how important this was to me. So I called her today and she didn't even apologize for leaving. She made all kinds of excuses and I had it so I told her I would give her the money back for the dress. I am so sad. I have been friends with her for 10 years and she just kept letting me down when I needed her the most. The shower was the final straw. I don't know whether to cry or be relieved. Thanks for letting me vent.

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

I bet that was a huge weight off of your shoulders Good for you

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

Aww sweetie. I had to make the same decision. You know what? I'm glad I did, and I'm sure that someday you will realize you did too.
Best of luck

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

I had to make a similar decision a while back and to be honest, I think it was one of the best things I could have done. I realized that I only want the girls who TRUELY love me and care about me there while I get ready on my wedding day. And I want the girls to be as excited as I am. If she wasnt able to share in your joy, then she didnt deserve to be in your bridal party. You made the right decision.

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

Good for you! Better now than in August when you will have so much more important things to deal with! to you - some 'friends' just don't understand.

PS - I'm a Land's End bride too!

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

You may feel sad now, but in the end it was the right decision

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

I'm sure its for the best. The last thing you need is a bridesmaid who will make your life miserable and soil your wedding day. Ask many of the girls on here who wish they did what you have done!!

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

it was the right decision. there's enough stress that goes into a wedding... the people that are a part of it or are closest to you should not be adding to your stress. or disappointment. i'm sure it was a very difficult decision and must be hard being that you were friends with her for so long. but she was weighing you down and you don't need that or deserve it. especially on your wedding day

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

glad you went with your feelings it was the right decision do not doubt yourself for doing this.

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

I’m sorry you are going thru this, I know how much it hurts when people you count on and always thought would be there for you and you for them, make it clear thru their actions or lack there of , that they don’t feel the same way. But I think asking her to step down may be better in the long run, I know the last few months are the most stressful, you don’t need anyone else adding to it.

Good luck

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

Its hard when you have to do something like that, I had to kick one of my BM out of the wedding party. She is the type of person who doesn't care whose day it is and go out of her way to ruin others good time and she is family as well. Right now it hurts you but in the long run I think you will feel better about your decision.

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

You made the right choice....you definetely want to be surrounded by people who feel happiness and genuine joy on one of the most important days of your life. If she is acting like this, then the friendship would have eventually been over. And you would have been stuck with all the pics with her included.

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

I went thru the same thing!!!!! you learn who your true friends are planning a wedding...its sad but true. Your better off sweetie!

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

her loss. I hope she never needs you for anything

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

Thanks girls. I know it was the right thing to do and I am glad you all understand.

Re: I kicked one of my BMs out of my wedding party

Feel relieved-sometimes people just don't know how to be good friends. I'm sorry.