My Mom Hates My Dress

Ok - First off, I want to say I love my mom and value her opinion very much. I've always dreamed and imagined how much fun it would be to plan my wedding with her help and imput. So about a month ago we started dress shopping. We've gone to Bridal reflections, RK Bridal, Mark Ingram, and Designer loft. I must have tried on about 50 dresses all in all. Everything I liked- she didn't. We just have different tastes. She likes beading and lace and stuff. For me its about the fabric, clean lines and the cut. Granted the dresses she liked looked good on me, but they didn;t make me feel anything.

So there is this one dress, I loved it the minute I put it on. Its a Manale, ball gown, dropped waste, with box pleates, a little gathering in the bodice. Couture! Its simple, but its perfect and I feel like Grace Kelly in it. I tried it on with a gorgeous tiara, viel and earings and I cried!

That day I was so disappointed my mom didn;t feel the same way. She just said it was a little too plain. I tried to tell her that with a dress like that you jazz it up with some heavy bling- the tiara, the earings , a bracelet, etc. She seemed ok with it when we were at the place and actually said that it was up to me (www.designerloftnyc.com I highly recommend them! they know what they are doing and give you a wonderful experience, plus they have dresses/designers that r not so mainstream).

So a week later, she asked me when we are going dress shopping and I told her -'what do you mean, you know I made my decision already, you were there...' well, she went off! she said ' that dress is hideous, its too plain, it has no beading, no lace, i hate it, blah blah blah'

I'm thinking, r u kidding me, my own mom thinks the dress I absolutely love is hideous. The least she can do is keep it to herself, now shes mad at me! She said 'why did you even bother taking me along if you don't care about my opinion blah blah blah'

I'm upset. I know I have very good taste and the dress is no were near hideous, it just happens to have no beading! what the big %$#@%^! deal? I'm wearing it, not her!

All I'm saying is - She saw my reaction to it, why can't she just say, 'Its not my choice for you, but It looks great on you and you have to feel comfortable in it' THATS ALL!

I'm getting this dress weather she likes it or not, but I will always have her reaction to it in it the back of my mind.

PS - Both my Maid of Honors saw me in it and both loved it! One of them cried and said it was the one.

Any Advice?

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

why?

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

Why? Do you like it?

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

awww whyyyy?

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

Did she say why??? I am sure that if you chose it then it is beautiful. Remember not everyone has the same taste and YOU are the bride and YOU have to like it.

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

maybe you should go there again with her - and make her look at it one more time ... she has to understand that although she envisions you with a dress that has beads and lace - you have to get a dress that you love. maybe she will realize that if you giver her another chance. Or maybe go dress shopping again - to show her that your convinced that that dress is THE ONE and maybe she'll see that when your trying on other dresses.

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

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Posted by lilqtpie2181

awww whyyyy?

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Ladies....read her post....she wrote why her mom doesn't like it.

Sweetheart....sometimes...no matter what we want or expect from our moms or this wedding....it doesn't always go that way. We sometimes envision walking out of that dressing room and taking moms breath away. And in some instances, it just won't happen and you will have to agree to disagree. My mom and I are currently in a disagreement, I think tiara, she thinks no tiara and a small flower in my head, that is soo not my style

IMHO, If you love that dress. Love it soo much its all you think about and you picture yourself walking down the aisle with it, if the moment you put it on you felt like the princess you always imagined you would be......I say its the one...I say get it!!!

Because here's the thing...I had a friend with a similar situation. Her mom thought her dress was to plain, not enough pizazz, blah blah blah. She got it anyways against her moms wishes. Come the day of....she wore it so beautifully, the hairdo, the jewelery, everything complimented it and she was gorgeous...and even the mom said..You look perfect, I was wrong about this dress.

So...if thats the one for you, thats the one for you. Your happiness and exuberance will glow and shine on the outside so much...your mom will be able to tell you made the right decision...

Good luck and keep us posted

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

I'm sure when she see it all put together, the tiara, veil and other jewelry she'll have a change of heart. I showed my mom my dream dress, a Priscilla of boston also very plain no beading and she didn't like it but when I tried it on she cried. Everyone has different tastes. You just have to remember that all the really matters is that YOU love it! Good luck!

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

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Posted by soon2bmrsdunn

I'm sure when she see it all put together, the tiara, veil and other jewelry she'll have a change of heart. I showed my mom my dream dress, a Priscilla of boston also very plain no beading and she didn't like it but when I tried it on she cried. Everyone has different tastes. You just have to remember that all the really matters is that YOU love it! Good luck!

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See now this is a perfect example.....

One of our own 07ers with fantastic taste, its a mom thing.....don't let it get you down.

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

Sweetie as long as it makes you happy wear it proud!!!


Nina~ You always have the nicest things to say!! You're a doll!

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

hunny, bottom line is that it is YOUOR dress. i know mothers opinions mean a lot but that doesn't mean you have to agree. for your mom to be mad at you for something that u didnt even HAVE to invlove her in is insane. She doesnt have to like it but i have feeling once she see's you all done up in it she will agree that you look beutiful...U stand you ground. if that is THE ONE for you, if you felt like a true princess when you put it on then that is the dress that you should wear the day of your wedding....Good Luck!!

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

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Posted by Nina

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Posted by lilqtpie2181

awww whyyyy?

---

Ladies....read her post....she wrote why her mom doesn't like it.

Sweetheart....sometimes...no matter what we want or expect from our moms or this wedding....it doesn't always go that way. We sometimes envision walking out of that dressing room and taking moms breath away. And in some instances, it just won't happen and you will have to agree to disagree. My mom and I are currently in a disagreement, I think tiara, she thinks no tiara and a small flower in my head, that is soo not my style

IMHO, If you love that dress. Love it soo much its all you think about and you picture yourself walking down the aisle with it, if the moment you put it on you felt like the princess you always imagined you would be......I say its the one...I say get it!!!

Because here's the thing...I had a friend with a similar situation. Her mom thought her dress was to plain, not enough pizazz, blah blah blah. She got it anyways against her moms wishes. Come the day of....she wore it so beautifully, the hairdo, the jewelery, everything complimented it and she was gorgeous...and even the mom said..You look perfect, I was wrong about this dress.

So...if thats the one for you, thats the one for you. Your happiness and exuberance will glow and shine on the outside so much...your mom will be able to tell you made the right decision...

Good luck and keep us posted

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I completely agree with Nina, I totally value my mom's opinion, but if in my heart I really loved my dress I would buy it anyway and wear it proudly!! Like Nina said, on your day she can see you all dressed up and say 'oops, I made a mistake', sometimes we have to listen to our hearts

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

Thank you girls all so much!

Everything you guys said is right.

I have to love the dress, I'm going to wear it and I'm going to show her she was wrong.

I have to say LIW chat is awesome! I love the support that we brides give to one another.

Thanks!

I'll keep you all posted

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

When your mom see's how happy and beautiful you are wearing your dress, and when people comment to her how beautiful and happy you look she will realize what a great choice you made.

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

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Posted by CharLiz

Ok - First off, I want to say I love my mom and value her opinion very much. I've always dreamed and imagined how much fun it would be to plan my wedding with her help and imput. So about a month ago we started dress shopping. We've gone to Bridal reflections, RK Bridal, Mark Ingram, and Designer loft. I must have tried on about 50 dresses all in all. Everything I liked- she didn't. We just have different tastes. She likes beading and lace and stuff. For me its about the fabric, clean lines and the cut. Granted the dresses she liked looked good on me, but they didn;t make me feel anything.

So there is this one dress, I loved it the minute I put it on. Its a Manale, ball gown, dropped waste, with box pleates, a little gathering in the bodice. Couture! Its simple, but its perfect and I feel like Grace Kelly in it. I tried it on with a gorgeous tiara, viel and earings and I cried!

That day I was so disappointed my mom didn;t feel the same way. She just said it was a little too plain. I tried to tell her that with a dress like that you jazz it up with some heavy bling- the tiara, the earings , a bracelet, etc. She seemed ok with it when we were at the place and actually said that it was up to me (www.designerloftnyc.com I highly recommend them! they know what they are doing and give you a wonderful experience, plus they have dresses/designers that r not so mainstream).

So a week later, she asked me when we are going dress shopping and I told her -'what do you mean, you know I made my decision already, you were there...' well, she went off! she said ' that dress is hideous, its too plain, it has no beading, no lace, i hate it, blah blah blah'

I'm thinking, r u kidding me, my own mom thinks the dress I absolutely love is hideous. The least she can do is keep it to herself, now shes mad at me! She said 'why did you even bother taking me along if you don't care about my opinion blah blah blah'

I'm upset. I know I have very good taste and the dress is no were near hideous, it just happens to have no beading! what the big %$#@%^! deal? I'm wearing it, not her!

All I'm saying is - She saw my reaction to it, why can't she just say, 'Its not my choice for you, but It looks great on you and you have to feel comfortable in it' THATS ALL!

I'm getting this dress weather she likes it or not, but I will always have her reaction to it in it the back of my mind.

PS - Both my Maid of Honors saw me in it and both loved it! One of them cried and said it was the one.

Any Advice?

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Honestly, if you love it, THAT'S IT! bottom line. I'm sorry but your mom is being messed up. Do what YOU want honey it's YOUR day! She had a turn to wear her dress! And if she's going to be hurtful to you I would just not talk to her about it anymore. Don't let her put your dress down, stand up for yourself and tell her it's ultimately YOUR decision and she needs to respect it! If she doesn't have anything nice to say then she should just keep her mouth shut! If you feel great in the dress then you don't need anyone else's approval!!!!
XOXOXO
Kitty

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

LOL - I left my mom a note a on a post it this morning - it read 'my mom hates my dress, what I'm I gonna do - Thanks Mom' and then I drew a funny picture of me with the dress and tiara with HUGE tears streaming down my face! (LMAO - I have to scan it and post it later)

Sometimes it feels right to make fun of a situation- I feel it helps break the ice and make things less uncomfortable.

Anyway, I called my sister and told her what happend - she spoke to my mom earlier and already knew. She totally was on my side and all that stuff. She said mom was cracking up about the post it and said the reason why mom was upset was that she felt I took my MOH's advice more than her and she was a bit jealous.

Thats ridicoulous - first off my MOH and I have very different tastes, she just happens to admore mine and I hers, and she knows me and knows what I love.

I'll have to have a heart to heart with mom and tell her how much her opinion counts to me and although we r not on the same page on the dress, ulitmately its my decision. But there will be other things/ideas that she and I will do for the wedding that will be only ours.

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

I am glad to hear that no matter what she has said that you are sticking to what you want. If the dress makes you feel the way you want and look the way you want then that's all that matters. Remember Moms are Moms and they have a different vision sometimes. That's ok, but it's more important to live your dreams and be the way you want. That's what sets us apart from our moms.

Re: My Mom Hates My Dress

Im also not into beading, but very inot the fabric and the cut of the dress to best fit my shape. Mt mom cannot picture the dresses i like because she likes some beading. I tried on one my style and she loved it. She will come around and even if she does not on the big day she will beacuse you will look beautiful.