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Wedding Forums > Brides Helping Brides ™ > This is disturbing....
This is disturbing....
lauren721
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 03:52 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 03:52 PM
This is disturbing....
Yesterday, I went out to happy hour with a bunch of people that I work with. They are almost all married, or engaged, or seeing people, and they are all over each other! They havew no concept of the fact that they have significant others at home waiting forthem, and they are so cynical about their relationships. It is so sad. Last year, two of them were having this horrible affair- bot were married, and the guy had a one year old and his wife was 8 months pregnant! While he was out getting drunk, and fooling around, she was home hugely pregnant and running around after a baby! Whenever, I comment about their disgusting behavior, everyone is like, 'You'll see what it is like when you get married, you will be doing the same thing! ' I MOST CERTAINLY WILL NOT! Is it just me, or this really insane? They all act like it is normal.
Happybride2005
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 03:59 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 03:59 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
it is insane. i have this guy at work, that goes to the copa a few times a week without his wife. no one says u can't go out without your wife, but he loves to dance with all the single girls
sarahthegreat
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 03:59 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 03:59 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
not thats insane....that will most likelu not happen to me or anyone i know. yes things happen, but as far it being 'normal' to cheat on our spouses....no, its not
VogueBride
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 04:05 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 04:05 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
i feel bad for them....thats all i have to say. (meaning, i think is horrible!)
soontobemrsv
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 04:22 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 04:22 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
thats absolutely horrible and yes.. very disturbing
Soon2BeMrs2006
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 04:22 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 04:22 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
those are people that should not be married.
STBH
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 04:24 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 04:24 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
i hate cheaters and homewreckers!!!!!!!!!!!!!
JanuaryBride06
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 05:34 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 05:34 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
That is beyond insane! If that's their definition of marriage, then they shouldn't be married.
Tracy&Brian
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 05:53 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 05:53 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
I started a new job four weeks ago and a bunch of people (married and in relationships mostly) are sleeping with other people in the office. It is so bad and out of control, no one is allowed to bring their spouses for the Christmas party this year for fear of a fight breaking out (this is the first year they are instituting this rule). The head bosses all know about these 'affairs' and I think some of them are even involved with people in the office. I feel like I work in the middle of a big ORGY. I love my job otherwise, but everyday there is constant drama. Its so disgusting and scary to see how many married people completely ignore thier vows and cheat. Its horrendous and terrifying to me and constantly makes me wonder if that could ever happen to my 'healthy relationship' with my FH. Do people really begin to hate each other after they get married??? Its very scary to even think about...
sk1nny27
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 06:35 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 06:35 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
Posted by lauren721
Yesterday, I went out to happy hour with a bunch of people that I work with. They are almost all married, or engaged, or seeing people, and they are all over each other! They havew no concept of the fact that they have significant others at home waiting forthem, and they are so cynical about their relationships. It is so sad. Last year, two of them were having this horrible affair- bot were married, and the guy had a one year old and his wife was 8 months pregnant! While he was out getting drunk, and fooling around, she was home hugely pregnant and running around after a baby! Whenever, I comment about their disgusting behavior, everyone is like,
'You'll see what it is like when you get married, you will be doing the same thing! ' I MOST CERTAINLY WILL NOT! Is it just me, or this really insane? They all act like it is normal.
i will be damned. i talk about this with FH. it is truely disturbing!!!!
akaMrsT
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 06:56 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 06:56 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
Posted by Tracy&Brian
I started a new job four weeks ago and a bunch of people (married and in relationships mostly) are sleeping with other people in the office. It is so bad and out of control, no one is allowed to bring their spouses for the Christmas party this year for fear of a fight breaking out (this is the first year they are instituting this rule). The head bosses all know about these 'affairs' and I think some of them are even involved with people in the office. I feel like I work in the middle of a big ORGY. I love my job otherwise, but everyday there is constant drama. Its so disgusting and scary to see how many married people completely ignore thier vows and cheat. Its horrendous and terrifying to me and constantly makes me wonder if that could ever happen to my 'healthy relationship' with my FH. Do people really begin to hate each other after they get married??? Its very scary to even think about...
No, most people do not hate each other after they get married.
I think most office affairs happen when the people work in close proximity and for extended periods without seeing their spouse. I know of many office hook ups between married or involved people. One woman (married) was caught having sex in a rarely used area of the building with her side guy.

As for the no spouses or dates at the office holiday party - been there done that and have seen many a hook up from that too

One office hook up that I know of has resulted in a child and the woman quickly married her boyfriend and not the side guy - who himself is married with twins. It's just a mess and the new husband has no idea that the child is most likely NOT his. I only know since guys do gossip and FH was told about all the details.
Last but not least, a friends ex (an NYPD lieutenant) had an office hook up and now he has a child with a woman from work (someone in narcotics). My friend dumped him since he can't even be trusted to go to work without sleeping around (and she caught him doing it before with a different woman from work)
ETA - I still thik these are isolated cases and that not everyone cheats.
MattsBride
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 08:10 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 08:10 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
That is terrible! And yes, VERY disturbing!! I have never seen that going on and I'm surprised that the people doing it are so open about it!
MrsStefan
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 09:56 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 09:56 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
That IS horrible! And insane...if you are SO unhappy in your marriage then try to work it out, or get out of the marriage..and for GOD SAKE...STOP MAKING BABIES if you are that unhappy ni your marriage. I feel bad for the prego wife at home! There is a guy at my job who hits on the woman all the time but nobody entertains him. I couldnt even image!
ChrissynRicky
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 11:29 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 11:29 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
To me, it's disturbing, but I'm surprised by it. I work in Finance, and I can't tell you how many times I've seen the rings slip off into pockets at happy hour, parties, etc....
jenheartsrob
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 11:36 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 11:36 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
that's so troubling to me... makes me wonder how it gets that bad, or what their relationships were like when they were good and got married... do things really deteriorate like that? :( sad thought....
Mrs. dleeny
Posted: Dec 10, 2005 11:54 PM+

Posted: Dec 10, 2005 11:54 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
I find this behavior revolting!I have seen people do this, a LOT! now that I am married (and even before) I wouldn't DREAM of doing something like that.
clearly these people are not in love. a person in love would never behave this way
IMO
waterspout4
Posted: Dec 11, 2005 03:49 AM+

Posted: Dec 11, 2005 03:49 AM
Re: This is disturbing....
I agree with you all! This is disturbing. It seems that people enter marriage because they like to know that someone is waiting for them when they get home....er....IF they come home.I work with a guy who leaves work with a woman for a 'second' lunch break, and his wife calls all the time. So sad.
Tracilee82
Posted: Dec 11, 2005 07:19 AM+

Posted: Dec 11, 2005 07:19 AM
Re: This is disturbing....
I hate to hear this stuff!!! There is so much of this going on today, and it's just horrible to hear. I don't agree with it either way, but when there's kids involved, I hate it even more! So many people can't have kids and can't seem to find the right person, and then you have the people that take advantage of it all!
seta
Posted: Dec 11, 2005 08:44 AM+
Re: This is disturbing....
That is.. i was in a situation like that at a work function..and it was such a turn off. i swear i couldn't look at that co-worker for a long time..it really made me loose all respect for them.
October Bliss
Posted: Dec 11, 2005 01:15 PM+

Posted: Dec 11, 2005 01:15 PM
Re: This is disturbing....
IMHO, if you find the 'right' person, you will do whatever it takes to make it work, always. However, when in a relationship with the 'wrong' person, stepping outside the relationship doesn't seem all that bad (or wrong). There are a few friends I stopped speaking to because they stepped outside their marriage, and I thought it was completely wrong, dishonest and disgusting. Then I decided I had no idea what was going on in their relationship, and I was being too judgmental. (one girl in particular had a HUGE fear of being alone, and despite being in a psychologically abusive relationship couldn't leave until she found someone else to 'take care of her' - did that make cheating right? No, but after I heard all the facts and circumstances I understood what she did and why [although I thought counseling to build her self-esteem to leave was a much better option]) Do I think you're insane? No. Do I think cheating is wrong? Yes. Do I think cheating is normal? In certain circles, there are those that think it is.Welcome New Vendors
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