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Jackie&Justin
Memories
Member since 4/05 2535 total posts
Wedding Date:
11/18/2006 11:00 AM
Wed. Location:
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Repost from BHB-ADVICE NEEDED
Okay so I've been friends with this girl since 9th grade....My FI and I have been dating now for 5 1/2 years...She and her FI have been dating a little over a year....My FI and I got engaged last December of 04, and she got engaged last February 05....She announces her wedding is July 06 (mine is November 06)....Now, here's the thing...I kinda feel like shes stealing my thunder!!!!! She also picked me for her MOH, but I don't really feel that close to her.... We hardly talke anymore and when my brother died last year, she really wasn't supportive, she was more into her then boyfriend, and I really needed a friend during that time...She's supposed to be my "best friend"...Plus she is CONSTANTLY complaining that her and her FI get into fights and he is lazy and wont work and she has to support him.....So I guess my questions are:
1- Am I being immature/jealous that she is getting married before me?
2-Should I decline to be her MOH?
Sorry in advance if I am being a bit childish....Thanks for any advice!!!
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Posted 7/20/05 11:19 PM 
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Jennie0898
saving bee bees since 2005
Member since 5/05 3083 total posts
Wedding Date:
9/23/2006 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Watermill
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Re: Repost from BHB-ADVICE NEEDED
About being her MOH, I would say if you're already questioning it I would say bail. You have the perfect excuse, you'll be really busy planning your own wedding and don't feel you will be able to give her time and support she deserves.
Try not to be angry abou her deciding to get married before you. She may not have chosen that date to steal your thunder. Who knows maybe she's not even looking at it that way.
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Posted 7/20/05 11:28 PM
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Jen2999
What's next?!
Member since 11/04 9849 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/7/2006 4:00 PM
Wed. Location:
CHATEAU LA MER--AMAZING!
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Re: Repost from BHB-ADVICE NEEDED
I would say to let the fact that she is getting married before you slide, but def tell her that since you will be planning your own wedding, youd rather be in the bridal party bc you cant give her the amount of attention she may need or something.
I would feel the SAME way if someone decided to get married before me etc, but then again, in the grand scheme of things, it wont affect your wedding.
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Posted 7/20/05 11:36 PM
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SuzBride
The Jack!
Member since 1/05 9762 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/8/2006 11:30 AM
Wed. Location:
Land's End :) 11!
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Re: Repost from BHB-ADVICE NEEDED
Posted by Jennie0898
About being her MOH, I would say if you're already questioning it I would say bail. You have the perfect excuse, you'll be really busy planning your own wedding and don't feel you will be able to give her time and support she deserves.
Ditto. I would say no - say that you are planning your wedding. Honestly, I wouldn't want a MOH who said yes out of a sense of obligation, I would want one who said yes because she WANTS to help/support. Plus, independent of when her wedding is in comparison to yours, I know I wouldn't want to say yes to being a MOH for someone I am not really super close to. It is a lot of responsibility and $$$, and I wouldn't want to end up being bitter and feeling forced.
Tell her you would love to help with her wedding, but have too much on your plate to do all that the MOH role entails 
Message edited 7/21/2005 8:00:33 AM.
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Posted 7/21/05 8:00 AM
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Jackie&Justin
Memories
Member since 4/05 2535 total posts
Wedding Date:
11/18/2006 11:00 AM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Repost from BHB-ADVICE NEEDED
Thank you for responding and for your advice...
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Posted 7/21/05 10:07 AM
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JanuaryBride06
boyfriend in my head
Member since 4/05 13019 total posts
Wedding Date:
1/8/2006 12:00 PM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Repost from BHB-ADVICE NEEDED
It sounds like you're not so excited by the prospect of being MOH - I agree with the other posts saying that you should back out and say that you'll to use what time (and funds) that you have for your wedding.
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Posted 7/21/05 10:10 AM
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lulugrrl
I'm a MRS.!!!!:-)
Member since 5/05 1094 total posts
Wedding Date:
2/17/2006 6:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Carlyle on the Green
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Re: Repost from BHB-ADVICE NEEDED
Posted by Jen2999
I would say to let the fact that she is getting married before you slide, but def tell her that since you will be planning your own wedding, youd rather be in the bridal party bc you cant give her the amount of attention she may need or something.
I would feel the SAME way if someone decided to get married before me etc, but then again, in the grand scheme of things, it wont affect your wedding.
i totally agree
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Posted 7/21/05 10:21 AM
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nicpizzo
I'm Married!!!!
Member since 1/04 1127 total posts
Wedding Date:
4/2/2006 3:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Estate at East Wind
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Re: Repost from BHB-ADVICE NEEDED
I would say based on your reservations about being her MOH, that maybe it would be best to decline. Like another poster mentioned, you have a prefect excuse that you're busy with your own plans.
About her getting married before you, I'd let it pass. It's not worth it getting all upset or stressed over. Your wedding will be completely different and memorable for its own reasons.
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Posted 7/21/05 10:28 AM
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