Questions about tipping from FI

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

lol now you know why I went to CH. They include service charge and you pay 1.50pp and its shared between EVERYONE. So I really didnt have worries about tipping. SOme of peoples calculations scare me when I see the amount of tips they have to give out

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

IMO you should DEFINATELY tip...They are providing a service and if you are happy with it..You tip...That is me.
MY maitre'd was FABULOUS so was my bridal attendant..They helped me out sooo much i couldn't imagine not tipping them..

Same goes with everyone else...I do feel you should tip...regardless what your FH's past history was.

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

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Posted by myasmom

lol now you know why I went to CH. They include service charge and you pay 1.50pp and its shared between EVERYONE. So I really didnt have worries about tipping. SOme of peoples calculations scare me when I see the amount of tips they have to give out

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Okay, FI said 'she's up on the computer now. It's a cult. It's okay now though since I know who they all are now.'

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

He's right about the bridal attendant. I never heard that you tip her per person. My bridal attendant looked like she was either a high school student, or maybe a college student. She did a GREAT job, so I gave her a $50 tip at the end of the night and she was very greatful. I don't think she was expecting anything because she tipped my water glass over onto my guest book and one of the pages ripped. But, she's a human and accidents happen.

My Maitre D also looked like he was maybe a college student. He did a good job so at the end of the night, we gave him $300 (we had 125 guests) and he was also very thankful.

But, before my wedding, I told my banquet manager at Leonard's that I don't agree with the additional tip for these people when I already paid a gratuity. So, he said, 'wait until the end of the night. If you feel like giving them something, go ahead. If not, it's not required, but it would be a nice gesture if they do a good job.'

So, at the end of the night, I was very happy with them and I tipped them.

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

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Posted by kdrainey

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Posted by myasmom

lol now you know why I went to CH. They include service charge and you pay 1.50pp and its shared between EVERYONE. So I really didnt have worries about tipping. SOme of peoples calculations scare me when I see the amount of tips they have to give out

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Okay, Reggie said 'she's up on the computer now. It's a cult. It's okay now though since I know who they all are now.'

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for Reggie lol.
Tell him its an addiction lol.
I am up cause we have a realtor appt at 12 and AMAYA..yes Amaya is snoring

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

I've never heard of tipping the bridal attendant per person. I tipped my attendant based on how much she took care of the bridal party during the CH and then DH and I during the reception.
As far as the Maitre D, our ceremony and reception were at the same location, and he had our day moving without DH and I having a care in the world. We tipped him over $3 per guest.
As far as the waitstaff, the gratutites included in the package at your hall, does not actually go to the waitstaff or bartenders. While I was absolutely po'd about this, this is also how they make their living and I would never stiff them since they were the ones taking care of and serving my guests that day. Everyone raved about their service so we made sure to tip the wait staff and the bartender.
Your FI is right though, we are all in the wrong business!

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

anyone else know the reasoning behind some of the 'suggested' gratuities?

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

Well like you said some halls just pay a straight salary so its nice if the employees get a tip from us at the end of the night..but I think its not fair though that the hall keep the 18% service charge/tip for themselves..so Id talk to the hall and see if they'll work something out with you.

I dont plan on tipping my bridal attendant per person..but rather a flat rate based on how much she helps me out. Ive never heard of anyone tipping the attendant per person at the wedding!

Our limo co. included a 20% gratuity in our contract but we're still going to end up tipping our drivers even though its not required. I would just feel weird not tipping them at all. I wish I didnt have to pay the 20% to the co. in the first place but what can ya do?!

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

I would tip because many years ago I worked in a catering hall in Queens where we never got a dime from the service charge that they charged the customer, We only got what ever tip that the guest left for us or what the Bride and the groom left for us, 90% of the time is was nothing. Not only was I paid below min wage but I was not getting tips either.

I would tip the waiters, and bridal attendant more because they work harder to make your day wonderful. JMO

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

I am not sure why the bridal attendant tip would be per perso. I think it is because 1) in gerneal a tip is a precentage of your bill & your bill is based onhow many peopel & 2) someplaces say to tip teh bridal attendat the same as the maitre d' & he gets a tip based per person, b/c he is overseeignteh whoel thing.

I asked my hall & they said every gets tipped FROM the gratuity, EXCEPT the MAitr d'. Then th BM suggested if we wanted to tip anyone extra, we should probabaly tip the birdal attendant, b/c she does a lot, but we didn't end up having a bridal attendant.

The Maitre d' was excellent, so we tipped him
what we had pllaned plus half of what we had pallned or the bridal assistatn. I also gave the bartender a small tip, b/c the hall didn't cahrge us for soemthign they wer suppsoed to, so I had extra $ & was in a giving mood.
Guests als tipped the bartendeder I was going to tro try & avoid this, but I know my guests & a lot of them like to tip & would do it anyway.


It seems like a lot when you are budgeting, but that night, I was so imrpessed with everyone, we were handing out money left & right!

ETA-- The maitee does SO much more than sit around & watch the show.
When I arrived, the candles weren't how I wanted them so had peopel fix them. He made sure the band knew where to sit & that the staff took their orders. He let me know when I shoudl be back at my seat for the first dance, toast, cake, etc. He he asked me about puttign the favors out b/c he saw people were leaving early. He called a cab for some friends of mine. He followed me & DH around filling up our drinks & at the CH hour made sure that we & our parents always had something to eat & drink. He even cut my pastrami! When it was hot, my mom ( with my ok) asked him if he could adjust the AC & he did.
Another reason he may get paid per guest, is because the more, guests, the more servers they have, so the more peopel he has to supervisor. But yes, they do know their jobs well, so he mostly took care of any situations the came up & waited on me & DH hand & foot.

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

I have never heard of tipping the bridal attendant per person. it is customary to tip when a service is being performed. the service charge usually is for the wait staff but the maitr d and the attendant isn't. Most people who receive tips rely on them as they make up most of what they are paid. When I was a waitress I lived of my tips. Minimum wage is lower for waiters waitresses and almost anyone who works on tips.

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

i have to say that i get in those moods where i feel that way too

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

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Posted by tourist

I asked my hall & they said every gets tipped FROM the gratuity, EXCEPT the MAitr d'. Then th BM suggested if we wanted to tip anyone extra, we should probabaly tip the birdal attendant, b/c she does a lot, but we didn't end up having a bridal attendant.

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We have been told this at most halls - that the gratuity is split with the staff except the Maitre D.

Re: Questions about tipping from FI

As far as all the questions regarding tipping, Tips arent something that is REQUIRED, but APPRECIATED. If you think a person is doing a crappy job, then IMO, use your discretion.

And besides, it is a wedding, its a big affair, and people who work a wedding work very hard. As far as tipping bridal attendant or Maitre D a certain amount of money per guest, that is just a guideline to go to, again, not REQUIRED.

I know its a lot of people to tip the day of....but its common courtesy and most of them deserve it for their hard work.....and I'm sure there are some that dont....