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Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question
leese Posted: Jan 28, 2005 12:36 PM+
leese MEMBER SINCE: 11/04 TOTAL POSTS : 4773 WEDDING DATE: Mar 25, 2006
Posted: Jan 28, 2005 12:36 PM bride-minus.png

Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question

When I went to go meet with my priest, he rushed through what we could do at the ceremony to honor FH's father.

We can't do flowers to Mary because it's Lent.

What I'd like to do is a special reading (possibly from scripture) by a close friend and then FH and I 'do something' -

Don't want to light a candle because it's too much 'candle' with the unity candle too.

Maybe ring a bell (saw that on Oprah) or I even thought as a loophole, couldn't we place a bouquet of flowers on a seat down on the aisle - next to his mother (it's not the altar and the priest told me I could have flowers on the pew).

Any other ideas? And do you know if you can do that (add a reading and do something like ring a bell or something?).

TIA
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beautyq115 Posted: Jan 28, 2005 12:39 PM+
beautyq115 MEMBER SINCE: 12/04 TOTAL POSTS : 16776 WEDDING DATE: Jul 16, 2006
Posted: Jan 28, 2005 12:39 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question

I really like the idea of putting the flowers on the empty seat next to your mom! Thats really sweet!

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dpli Posted: Jan 28, 2005 12:40 PM+
dpli MEMBER SINCE: 1/04 TOTAL POSTS : 2470 WEDDING DATE: Nov 07, 2004
Posted: Jan 28, 2005 12:40 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question

We don't have any living parents, so we included all of them by name in the prayers of the faithful. Even that choked me up, I am not sure I would have stayed composed through much more than that as a memorial.

I think there was a post about this recently where someone said something about leaving his seat empty and placing tulle on it or placing flowers on it. If I were to do that, I would check with FH's mom- to see if she is comfortable with it as well.
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Jamie&MarkSept.'05 Posted: Jan 28, 2005 12:50 PM+
Jamie&MarkSept.'05 MEMBER SINCE: 1/05 TOTAL POSTS : 1340 WEDDING DATE: Sep 24, 2005
Posted: Jan 28, 2005 12:50 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question

I LOVE the idea of putting the flowers next to his Mom on an empty seat. That would be wonderful...I would also make sure she is OK with that as well...it may be too emotional for her.

How sweet.
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TwoBugs Posted: Jan 28, 2005 01:01 PM+
TwoBugs MEMBER SINCE: 8/03 TOTAL POSTS : 2394 WEDDING DATE: Sep 04, 2004
Posted: Jan 28, 2005 01:01 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question

We put some flowers next to my grandmother to honor my grandfather. We also dedicated the flowers on the altar to his memory (we wrote that in the program).

At the reception, we had an empty place setting next to my grandmother as well.
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Laura1976 Posted: Jan 28, 2005 01:02 PM+
Laura1976 MEMBER SINCE: 8/04 TOTAL POSTS : 1953 WEDDING DATE: May 07, 2005
Posted: Jan 28, 2005 01:02 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question


Posted by beautyq115

I really like the idea of putting the flowers on the empty seat next to your mom! Thats really sweet!




I think thats beautiful
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cloddy Posted: Jan 28, 2005 01:32 PM+
cloddy MEMBER SINCE: 12/04 TOTAL POSTS : 1071 WEDDING DATE: Jun 04, 2005
Posted: Jan 28, 2005 01:32 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question

They suggested the prayers of the faithful as a good place to honor friends/family members
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leese Posted: Jan 28, 2005 01:34 PM+
leese MEMBER SINCE: 11/04 TOTAL POSTS : 4773 WEDDING DATE: Mar 25, 2006
Posted: Jan 28, 2005 01:34 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question


Posted by cloddy

They suggested the prayers of the faithful as a good place to honor friends/family members



I would do it there, but we want to do something seperate for the his father.

Between us we have lost a LOT of family members. I think we want to do something significant. I just wish we could have done the flowers to mary thing.

I think the flowers at the empty seat might be a good idea.

Do you think we could do an extra reading?
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Dom n Nic Posted: Jan 28, 2005 01:36 PM+
Dom n Nic MEMBER SINCE: 10/04 TOTAL POSTS : 3589 WEDDING DATE: Aug 30, 2012
Posted: Jan 28, 2005 01:36 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question


Posted by leese

When I went to go meet with my priest, he rushed through what we could do at the ceremony to honor FH's father.

We can't do flowers to Mary because it's Lent.

What I'd like to do is a special reading (possibly from scripture) by a close friend and then FH and I 'do something' -

Don't want to light a candle because it's too much 'candle' with the unity candle too.

Maybe ring a bell (saw that on Oprah) or I even thought as a loophole, couldn't we place a bouquet of flowers on a seat down on the aisle - next to his mother (it's not the altar and the priest told me I could have flowers on the pew).

Any other ideas? And do you know if you can do that (add a reading and do something like ring a bell or something?).

TIA




WHEN IS EASTER NEXT YEAR?????


i heard from a few people that my church covers the status during lent...

if they do i will be pissed !!!!!!!!!!!!

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dpli Posted: Jan 28, 2005 02:14 PM+
dpli MEMBER SINCE: 1/04 TOTAL POSTS : 2470 WEDDING DATE: Nov 07, 2004
Posted: Jan 28, 2005 02:14 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question

Check with the priest about the readings. We deviated a bit from the typical reading structure and it was fine. I think as long as it doesn't change the important parts of the mass or ceremony, he will be willing to add a reading as a tribute.

The church covers the crucifixes for sure during lent....can't remember about the statues.

Easter 2006 is Sunday, April 16th. Ash Wednesday is on March 1st, so Lent is between March 1st and April 16th.
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VS11 Posted: Jan 28, 2005 02:47 PM+
VS11 MEMBER SINCE: 1/05 TOTAL POSTS : 3241 WEDDING DATE: Jan 01, 2012
Posted: Jan 28, 2005 02:47 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question


Posted by soon2bmrsp06


Posted by leese

When I went to go meet with my priest, he rushed through what we could do at the ceremony to honor FH's father.

We can't do flowers to Mary because it's Lent.

What I'd like to do is a special reading (possibly from scripture) by a close friend and then FH and I 'do something' -

Don't want to light a candle because it's too much 'candle' with the unity candle too.

Maybe ring a bell (saw that on Oprah) or I even thought as a loophole, couldn't we place a bouquet of flowers on a seat down on the aisle - next to his mother (it's not the altar and the priest told me I could have flowers on the pew).

Any other ideas? And do you know if you can do that (add a reading and do something like ring a bell or something?).

TIA




WHEN IS EASTER NEXT YEAR?????


i heard from a few people that my church covers the status during lent...

if they do i will be pissed !!!!!!!!!!!!





it's on 4-16-06..and lent is 40 days prior..

uh oh,,dont go crazy on the priest,,I dont want to see u on fox news!!
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BCTM33 Posted: Jan 28, 2005 02:53 PM+
BCTM33 MEMBER SINCE: 2/04 TOTAL POSTS : 2139 WEDDING DATE: Oct 29, 2004
Posted: Jan 28, 2005 02:53 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question


Posted by Jamie&MarkSept.'05

I LOVE the idea of putting the flowers next to his Mom on an empty seat. That would be wonderful...I would also make sure she is OK with that as well...it may be too emotional for her.

How sweet.



I completely agree! You could do it when it is time to do the 'peace' thing....

ETS: My church never covered anything during lent, crucifixes or statues...
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leese Posted: Jan 28, 2005 03:36 PM+
leese MEMBER SINCE: 11/04 TOTAL POSTS : 4773 WEDDING DATE: Mar 25, 2006
Posted: Jan 28, 2005 03:36 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question


Posted by soon2bmrsp06


[UOTE]


WHEN IS EASTER NEXT YEAR?????


i heard from a few people that my church covers the status during lent...

if they do i will be pissed !!!!!!!!!!!!




in my church they cover the crucifix in purple swag...my wedding color! yeah! lucky me.

we don't have statues...its very country-esque, my church.

it's totally lent during our wedding. i have no probs other than the no flowers to the altar thing. (but this saves money!) my grandma is an eucharistic minister and she thinks that you may be able to use FERNS because they are not real flowers. I'll have to check on that.
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halloweenbride04 Posted: Jan 28, 2005 10:22 PM+
halloweenbride04 MEMBER SINCE: 8/03 TOTAL POSTS : 2664 WEDDING DATE: Oct 31, 2004
Posted: Jan 28, 2005 10:22 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question

Unfortunately, DH's father is no longer with us either. At the very beginning of the ceremony, right after I joined DH at the altar the priest said 'Chris would like to honor his father by lighting a memorial candle.' DH, lit the candle alone, it took about 1 minute. We had a mass and had the priest mention his father's name in the Prayer of the Faithful and we also remember our close deseased friends and relatives in our program with a short poem and listed their names.

It's your ceremony and the priest should honor that you want to remember FH's father, so don't let him rush you through anything!
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Moehick Posted: Jan 29, 2005 05:59 PM+
Moehick MEMBER SINCE: 9/03 TOTAL POSTS : 7332 WEDDING DATE: Mar 14, 2004
Posted: Jan 29, 2005 05:59 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Catholic Brides...Church/Departed Family Question

He said you can't offer flowers to Mary?? We did and I got married on a Sunday in lent.
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